Solving the Right Problem: Why Your Lack of Sleep Isn’t the Real Issue (and What Is)

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In this manifesto…
We dismantle the myth that your exhaustion is the problem. It's not the 3 a.m. wake-ups or your inability to “just get more sleep.” It’s the structure of a life that wasn’t built with you at the center. In this piece, we’re rethinking what goals actually mean, why we often aim at the wrong target, and how reclaiming your personal criteria for success can completely shift how you live, work, and rest. If you’ve ever been told you’re lazy, unmotivated, or “just need a better routine,” this one’s for you. You’re not broken—the system is. And you’re finally allowed to design something softer, smarter, and sacred.

Solving the Right Problem: Why Your Lack of Sleep Isn’t the Real Issue (and What Is)

It’s 3 a.m.
You’re awake.
And not just scrolling-for-no-reason awake.
You’re thinking. Again.

Maybe it starts like it did for me: with a yawn, then a sigh, then a “how is it morning already?” And that’s when it hit me—what if the thing I’ve been trying to fix isn’t the thing that needs fixing?

We are constantly told to manage our sleep, buy lavender spray, stop scrolling, set alarms, and for the love of God, drink more water. But what if sleep isn’t the problem?

What if the problem is your job?

And not just your job—but your life being wrapped around it like a tortilla of somebody else’s lunch?

The Real Problem Hiding in Plain Sight

The truth is, we’ve been solving for symptoms.

We call it burnout, fatigue, Sunday scaries, decision fatigue, procrastination, and even “just needing to focus better.” But the root? We’ve centered our lives around labor that was never meant to honor our rhythms, values, or even our basic humanity.

We’re taught to build goals inside of someone else’s structure. We’re told:

• Wake up early.

• Work hard.

• Make money.

• Rest after success.

• Don’t be too ambitious.

• Don’t be too lazy either.

• Don’t question the blueprint.
  

But baby, the blueprint is a cage.

When You Center Life Around Work, You Shrink

You shrink into tiny versions of yourself that fit into calendars, expectations, and 30-minute lunch breaks. You start to measure success by how little rest you need. You become an expert at ignoring your body. You sleep when you’re dead. You wear exhaustion like a badge.

I did that too.

And now, lying awake in the middle of the night, I finally saw it clearly:
The goal isn’t more sleep.
The goal is a life that makes space for sleep.

The difference is everything.

Rewriting the Definition of a Goal

Goals, as we’ve been taught, are conquest-based: hit the target, get the reward, be validated. But the deeper truth is that goals are tools. And the best tools help you solve the right problem.

You don’t need a five-step routine if the problem is your entire lifestyle.
You don’t need more discipline if the structure you’re in is undisciplined about your wellbeing.
You don’t need to fix your sleep. You need to reclaim your sovereignty.

So What Is the “Right Problem”?

The right problem is the one underneath the one you’ve been told to focus on.

Example:

• Symptom: You keep waking up at 3 a.m.
  

• Obvious solution: Fix your sleep.
  

• Right problem: You’re mentally and spiritually misaligned with your life rhythm.
  

• Real solution: Create a life that supports your body’s wisdom.
  

Another example:

• Symptom: You procrastinate on work.

• Obvious solution: Get more productive tools.

• Right problem: The work isn’t aligned with your deeper purpose or pleasure.

• Real solution: Redesign your career path to honor your values.
  
  

You feel what I’m saying?

The Unlearning Required to Get Free

It’s one thing to say “okay, I want a soft life.”
It’s another thing to believe you’re worthy of it.

We’ve been conditioned to think that ease is laziness. That if we’re not struggling, we’re not doing enough. That the only way to win is to suffer.

So when you start to reframe your goals—from “I want to get rich” to “I want to build a sustainable business that honors my rest”—the old programming kicks in.

That’s why your healing isn’t just a mindset shift—it’s a spiritual rebellion.

You will have to:

• Unlearn hustle as identity

• Reclaim your rhythms as divine

• Redefine success as sustainability

• Reimagine productivity as joy
  
  

You will be called lazy.
You will question yourself.
You will want to go back to “normal.”

Don’t.

What Happens When You Solve for You

When you build your goals around your life (instead of contorting your life around somebody else’s goal), everything clicks into place:

• You sleep better because your body no longer feels unsafe.
  

• You move slower, with more intention.
  

• You say no with ease.
  

• You stop trying to earn your existence.
  

• You feel rooted.
  

• You remember who you were before you became someone's employee, someone’s planner, someone’s project.
  

And in that remembering, you start living again.

Let’s Get Specific: How to Solve for the Right Problem

1. Audit Your Symptoms
   What are you constantly trying to fix? Is it always “I need more sleep,” “I need more focus,” “I need to stop procrastinating”? These are flags, not flaws.
   

2. Ask What the Symptom is Trying to Tell You
   Maybe your 3 a.m. wake-ups are the only time your soul has quiet. Maybe your procrastination is a protest.
   

3. Redefine What Success Looks Like For You
   Write your own criteria. Your own definition of a “good day.” What do you need more of? (Peace? Creativity? Autonomy?)
   

4. Design Goals Around You (Not Around the Job)
   Example: “I want to create a $5K/month blogging business” should be rooted in:
   

• Working hours that support your energy

• Topics you actually care about

• Products that align with your mission
  
  

5. Measure Progress by Alignment, Not Approval
   Did that step make you feel more rooted? Then it counts. Even if nobody claps.
   
   
   

The Takeaway

You’re not here to become more optimized for capitalism.
You’re not a robot.
You don’t need another 5 a.m. routine.

You need a life that lets you sleep.
A life that honors your rhythms.
A life that fits you, not one you have to contort yourself to fit.

Start solving for that.
That’s the only real goal worth chasing.

Call to Action:
• If this manifesto hit your soul, share it with someone who’s tired of being tired.
• Leave a comment and tell me: what’s the real problem you’re ready to solve?
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Live Pleasurably,

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